User blog:MMayheMM/Scared..

I've been gone for about what....?

Two weeks.....

Two weeks and I've lately been managing to delve deep on my own.......

I've.. Been talking to a friend who I've been explaining my... Emotions..... Nothing to get them rattled.... Or afraid...... Or let me them know what I've been up to........

I-.... I don't know if this is the correct place to be writing this....... Or if I even want.... Anyone to know.... As I can barely keep together without pondering my questions... And what I know already

....

I'm shaking. But I'm withstanding this...

For... The past week I've been getting, well.. Starting to dream up....

Have a couple of thoughts crawl into my head.....

Many many days ago I've.. Had a short dream come into my head......

Since for me school is coming up in weeks... The day I had this dream I was partially concerned and wanting time to speed up so I can do what I have to......

It started out at me walking into the building and taking a turn down the school stairs toward the basement.... In there, it is actually common to wait in the basement of the school, (which is the cafeteria.) for teachers to come in and call to deport students to the first period of the day.......

Well, when I stepped in apparently remember there being a whole lot of people..... Vivid, loud noises,talking.

And in front of me blindly there was just a group of other students. And somewhere in that small group I found a solid silohouette of a person, particularly male... No features what so ever and nothing threatening....

But it was as if my mind wanted to block out that person..... Now, I also remember that this person was acting like any other kid in the ocean of students.... Movements, social personality, everything... But no sound from them.

And that was it......That was basically freakin' it.

And then... I had another dream.....

Days after.... I need to remember to record whatever comes to me in my journal....... But I was just urging.....

- In..... The other one this came to me as I was still awake and I had my eyes closed... Before this I was speaking of a differently topic and I was perfectly fine....

ALmost lik my little day-dream.... Just out of nowhere.....

Mind to say that at the moment I was laying down and everyone was asleep in my home....... Just my dog was shuffling and scratching.....

in my 'dream' I was laying down in bed as well until I heard someone creak the front door of my home open and walked toward my room.... My room is by the living room which houses the front door.....

They opened my room door abruptly and my sibling.... Wasn't around, since I  share a room with my sibling in reality......

They headed by my bed and grabbed my arm and dragged me out of my bed, I showed no stimuli or just any response... except for when they took my toward my living room and almost crossed out the front door... Down my stairs....

At that moment I remember looking up toward the person since the lights from the stairs came on and I was able to see features....

Hood on, navy dark blue, vest, and I saw the cleam of a something orange and shiny like a carabiner. clipped to the vest or the bottom.

Under the hood, just black, blank slate.

No face, but black.

Covering my mouth, and telling me to hush.

Cliche... Yes it sounds cliche but it just sounds...strange

-

And that's all the bullshit I could remember....... I just..... I'm not too worried, it is probably me and only me since I've been learning what I need to lately and have been watching things at night.... And that influences me to see the rarest things when I don't mean it...... But I recently linked the second dream with the first.........

I just want to know what this could mean or could just be my mind playing with me....

I take the second.... But every time I think so, I feel doubt.... It's like I'm forcing myself for it to be a prediction.......

My heart hurts....Hurts...Hurts.... And I feel tight grasps like fear and I can't think right now..... I'm trying to keep up with a different thought by talking to an ally of mine...... About something else......

It's pissing me off too...... But I'm pulling through....

Just what exactly is time planning for me......

Unless naivity is proving me idiotically....

I'll just wait....